Remnants v The Philanderers, Tuesday 25th August at Fitzwilliam

“In a very strong wind, even turkeys can fly”

Yes, positive thoughts were required as we arrived at Fitzwilliam in a severe howling westerly gale to face the old foe, The Remnants. With the wind coming directly over a very straight mid-off from the Huntingdon Rd end, captain George P took matters into his own hands and without any hint of consultation with the shortly to be arriving Fuhrer he, with the opposition captain, decided not only to have every over bowled downwind but adding insult to injury of the hitherto unchallenged “Club Commandments” agreed to 15x8 ball overs and retiring at 40. We cowered in the lea of the clubhouse expecting thunderous skies and bolts of lightning.

A strong Phillies mid-week line up, the habitual gaggle of Blues, together with our Premier League Pro were joined by native Lancastrian wicket-keeper batsman, Dave “Farok” Pimblett. Electing to bat George asked Ed D and Rob Gill to open proceedings, Dodson quickly falling to a gale assisted mud pie to allow Mel R to join Rob. Dodson was immediately dispatched (even before he got to the boundary) by the disgruntled George, to help make up fielding numbers for the Remnants. Runs a plenty, mostly behind square (although Rob did amazingly manage a straight hit four into the mistral) with dabs, ramps, cuts and pulls before Rob retired on 46 (not sure how that was worked out) and Mel succumbing to LBW as he swept off one knee, looking as stylish and imperious as ever. Meanwhile Ed P had come to the crease and deposited a number of sixes, two into the gardens, one chested over the boundary by the opposition having but having been joined by skipper George he retired on 44. Some odd goings on behind the boundary, Pimblett putting his keeping pads on to bat and spectator Hammo admitting to watching YouTube videos of Campbell at 1.00 am!! Innings closed at 168 for 4 wickets.

JB opened up and with the strong wind behind him he hurried the batsman and pushed “Farok” back to never before seen (or not since 1989) distances behind the stumps. Coteman replaced JB and once he had located line and length, not an easy task, he pinned their opening bat with the doosra and eventually snared 2 wickets. Runs flowed freely as Perkins, Campbell and Tilbury exchanged their usual seam-up for a mixed variety of off-spin, with various levels of success or not, James and Henry taking a wicket each. As the run-chase appeared to look easy for the Remnants they asked their overseas ringer, recently flown in from Kenya and looking suspiciously like Hammo under the lid, in jeans and trainers, to have a go. Selfishly hogging the strike, he ran out two of the Remnants stalwarts, then after a 6 and 4 and desperately trying to get back on strike again he managed to run himself out. Out of the jaws of defeat we had been presented with victory, the Remnants ending 17 runs short on 151 for 7 wickets.

Mention must be made of one extraordinary piece of fielding on the boundary by Rob Gill, immediately in front of the Fuhrer, but not surprisingly all post-match talk revolved around the strength of the wind and of course the extraordinary behaviour of their Kenyan “pro”!!

Ed Dodson

Farok & King George escaping from the hurricane

George spotted in the distance going birds nesting

​© The Philanderers Cricket Club 2020