The Philanderers v CamCeylon, Sunday 6th July at Exning Park

A non-match report by Tim Simmons

After weeks of hot dry weather, I awoke early on the morning of Sunday 6 July with three thoughts. (1) why on earth did I agree to play in this match at the age of 72 more than 20 years after I had retired, during which period I have had a discectomy, three coronary stents and two knee replacements (more on this decision process below) (2) where is my kit, if I still have any (I didn't)? (3) which way round the M25 shall I go in order to complete the 105 miles to Exning in time for a 1pm start, avoiding the roadworks at my nearest junction 10 which regularly close the M25 and A3 at weekends.

I opted correctly for the Dartford Crossing (but as I type this realise I forgot to pay the toll) and although delayed by an accident at J28 and a torrential downpour on the M11 arrived at the entrance to Exning Park at exactly 1pm. Already changed I was ready to dash onto the pitch and join my team if we were fielding first, or prepare myself for a swashbuckling cameo innings at number 11. I was reminded how 1pm in Sunday cricket is an ambition not an imperative when I discovered (a) I was the fifth player to arrive, including two of our opposition and (b) the gates were locked.

Over the next half hour, it was established that the groundsman had called off the match at 9am due to a waterlogged pitch but had omitted to tell anybody who might convey the news to the teams, all of whom were now parked in convoy along the road outside the ground. Before this, skipper Ed Pearson made a bold and successful attempt to climb over the barbed wire into the ground to see if anyone was around (they weren't) and as I drove off was organising distribution of the delicious Sri Lankan tea that our opponents and several of their fair ladies had prepared. Ed, I think a position in Gaza beckons.

Drawing silver linings from this inauspicious situation I was able to meet Mel Ragnauth for the first time since he had scored a half-century to help Cambridge beat Oxford c. 1995, be presented with my Philanderers shirt, photo of which should accompany this report if Ed has forwarded it, and have a 20 mins telephone conversation with Phil ,who reminded me I had achieved my main ambition of not getting injured during the match.

Volunteering to play for The Philanderers again after such a long break was part nostalgia and part folly of the type that makes you send knee-jerk reaction emails late at night (never do it, especially if alcohol involved, send the message to your draft box until morning). Reading Phil's increasingly frustrated exhortations for volunteers to make up the numbers for this fixture I remembered an afternoon in November 1973 when a stranger knocked on the door of my room in Cripps Court Selwyn College and asked if I'd like to play rugby for the Old Perseans that coming Saturday. He was very persuasive and seemed to be content to drink endless cups of tea until I agreed. I don't remember who we played or the result, but I do remember a friendly clubhouse in which several of the older players came over to chat to the new player and I enjoyed myself. The association lasted several years, was renewed when I moved back to Cambridge several years later, and then morphed into The Philanderers CC.

So, 52 years after meeting Phil I am taking this opportunity to thank him for the thousands of hours organising the Philanderers CC (and the OPRFC before it) from which I and many others have derived so much pleasure and he so much pain. What of The Philanderers at 41? The enigma persists, and as a Founder member and recent nearly-playing member I have some observations which may or may not be welcome. I shall pen them separately and seek permission to publish if invited but will make here three observations.

(1) all sports teams have success in cycles - The Philanderers started with a bunch of guys in their 30's who enjoyed each other's company as well as cricket, started to fade as we got older and was revived by another bunch of guys this time in their 20s like George Dean and his cohort of Perseans. Without an injection of new blood, limping on will be a painful task (2) The history and traditions of the club deserve preserving in some way but without moving quickly into the modern multi-media communications world will remain just that - history (3) to carry on requires a commitment from a small group of players who will recruit other friends to join, but some responsibility for the club needs to be devolved to them.

Tim Simmons

As you can see, being a democrat of the first order, permission was granted for Tim’s final paragraph to be included and the content of which is entirely true although I am confused about needing to move into modern multi-media communications after all I already have a mobile phone - The Fuhrer.

So far to come and then not know whether I can fit inside it!